A View With Some Room

The calm kept me cool
While time curled into a string
Bound tight and secure
Waiting to unwind and reveal everything

I liked being small
Invisible to the knowing
That chokes me now
And tells me I'm not possible today

Maybe I will step away
To watch people being just so
And laugh, then cry
Because I remember it all.

Now I keep time
with the rising and falling
of every single breath
And my eyes close to sleep.

Home

Let me see if I can get this out right. It feels like spinning. Spiraling, maybe. It makes my heart press against the wrong side of my chest. Panic. That part is over, but I keep forgetting. And that's not the worst part. It's the remembering that knocks me over.
There' no more carpet, just hardwood floors. Which are nice. But. Is it really over? Is it really over? No because I didn't pay close enough attention. To the way it felt, even though I still feel it and my eyes well up, I remember so well.
It was us. Me, and him, and him, and her, and her. And him and her. And down the road were the rest of us, and that's not the point. We were all there. We aren't all here.
It's too much. If I let it settle in, I start to crumble. We get to go back, though. Right? Do we get to go back? I want to go home. And be with you guys. I just want to tell you that I miss you. And I cry still. It was so good.
Maybe if I keep my eyes shut tight and ask to have it back. And mean it really hard. The we can be there. Oh gosh, but we can't, so i keep with the panic.
Until I walk into Grama's house. And it smells the same. And we cook. And it tastes the same. And we sit. And her hands are cool, and soft. And kind. The same.
And I feel better.

Image Capture

Thank you, Angelo.
It was a rough afternoon and you took this while I was telling you about how I slam doors now.
I felt better right after.
And now. Looking.
You got me down. To a tee. Or is it "T"?
How is anyone supposed to even know that?
Anyways, you got me. For now.

Of Course

Strings of words
I skip every other
So no one knows
What I want to say.

Better to have them
Smile and ask for my sleep
Than to be bright-eyed,
Than to let down.

I keep it close or
Throw far past
Ports of notice
Then. And then.

Surprise! Hello.
But you knew
I've always been this way.
For fifty-seven million years.